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I got a referral last week.

It came from someone I've known for a little while. But, not your typical “referral partner”. They were on my Just Get Started podcast a couple times, and we've kept in touch since then, from time to time.

We have a good relationship.

They knew I left my corporate sales role in February and went all in on my Fractional Sales Leader & Coaching business, working with early stage founders doing under $1 million in revenue.

So last week they reached out and asked if I could help with a specific problem a friend of theirs had. If so, they wanted to make an introduction.

The best thing…it was unprompted.

It’s a great example of someone being primed to make the right introduction. Just because of how I showed up as a podcast host and the relationship we’ve kept since.

That's what a real referral engine looks like.

Most founders don't have one yet. It’s mainly because they look at referrals as either:

And they treat their referrals as a volume play instead of a relationship. They exhaust all of their network at once and likely alienate people in the process.

But, a referral is people who trust you, know your work, and think of you the second they're standing in front of your next client.

Although we can’t always control when people will make an introduction, we can for sure ask them for one and keep the relationship

The old stat “88% of people are willing to give a referral, only 8% of people ask.” still holds true.

So let's build a real system to increase your chances.

Break your network into three groups instead of treating it as one big pile of contacts.

Bucket 1: Friends and peers who trust you.

Bucket 2: Clients or past clients who trust you.

Bucket 3: People you've worked with before, even loosely, who trust you.

That podcast guest from my story? Bucket 3. Someone who trusted me because of how I showed up, a while ago.

Each group knows a different version of you.

Your peers might already work alongside your ideal clients.

→ They could be true referral partners.

Your clients know your work intimately

→ But, they may not run into your ideal client day to day, even if they technically fit the mold.

Your past project partners trust you

→ But, they might need more context on what you're doing now.

The further down that list, the more explaining you'll need to do.

You’ve identified the people to ask, now what.

This is where the rails come off if you’re not careful.

A lot of times I hear this ask sound like…

"Hey, are there any founders in your network you think I should talk to?"

→ But that’s way too vague.

Try this instead…

"I’m working with early-stage B2B tech founders doing founder-led sales with typically under $1 million in revenue. Is there anyone that comes to mind that fits this description?"

That's specific enough that someone can actually picture it.

Now go one step further.

Identify the actual people yourself.

LinkedIn used to make this easy. Ten years ago, a connection usually meant you knew someone.

Unfortunately, not anymore and Linkedin has done a poor job cleaning this up. Connections don’t actually mean you are connected, in an actual useful way.

But, take the shot in the dark anyways.

Find 2-3 specific people through your contact's network. Mutual, 2nd degree connections you can see when you view their profile.

Then, Ask directly if they'll introduce you to those individuals.

That doesn't shut the door on anyone else. In fact, it opens it. You're just starting small and specific.

And just because they can't help today doesn't mean they can't help tomorrow.

Too many people automate this part.

Too many keep it bland.

The ask isn't specific enough, or it dumps too much work on the other person.

My advice is to do this in two messages. That you write.

First message:

→ Intro: Nice warm hello. Remember, you’re still human and you still want this relationship after this ask.

→ Reason: Specifically why you’re reaching out today.

→ Ask: Either the more general ask from above “Do you know…” or 2-3 people, specifically along with a Yes or No to confirm. (also, hyper-link their Linkedin profile URL to their name so they can easily view them, if needed.)

Here's what the first message should sound like.

Notice what this does.

→ If they say no, that's fine. It's not a closed door. They may have an alternative person they propose or they might come back later with someone else entirely.

→ If they say yes, the follow-up message stays just as simple.

2nd message:

→ Acknowledge: Reiterate their words to confirm understanding

→ Message: Insert pre-written message they could copy/paste

→ Timeline: Softly mention a time to complete this introduction

It might sound like:

You've made it nearly copy and paste, and taking almost all of the effort out of the introduction.

This removes a lot of the friction in the process.

Follow up once if you don't hear back.

Don’t pester.

And send new referral requests to this same group over time.

People want to help.

You just have to be willing to make a specific ask and make it as easy as possible for them to say yes.

You can't only ask. It can’t only be a one-way relationship.

You must be a “Go-giver”! (get the book if you’ve never read it)

Go back to your 3 buckets.

→ Clients might appreciate something extra in return.

→ Peers might want you sending business their way, or asking who they need to be introduced to.

→ Past project partners might not need anything more than knowing you care.

Look out for these opportunities.

Do this consistently and your referral engine stays warm.

Neglect it and it goes stale.

It’s really that simple.

Most people treat referrals like a one time ask, but they're not.

Referrals happen because people like you and want to help you.

And honestly, because it makes them look good when the introduction works out. (think of how quickly you are to suggest a restaurant, music or vacation spot because you had great memories.)

That podcast guest didn't owe me anything. They just remembered how I showed up. And, how I kept continuing to show up in keeping up with them and what they were doing.

Keep the engine rolling with a rotating group of people. Don't lean on the same five contacts every time.

Do that consistently and you’ll start to find people that continually want to help. And, referrals start to flow without you chasing them.

It just takes some real work up front.

Don't wait for the perfect list.

Just get started with one.

Let me know how it goes by replying to this newsletter, I read every one.

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